If men don’t shoulder equal responsibility when raising a family, women usually end up sacrificing everything for it.

Is a woman’s life bestowed with myriad opportunities in the modern scenario or is it just a fallacy? Having been bred in the best school and college of my hometown, I always looked forward to a future filled with success. Soon after cracking a competitive exam at the national level, I discovered that my career prospects had landed me in a professional institute.

Little did I know that this was short-lived! I soon got married and migrated to the city where my husband worked. The bliss of marriage seemed to outweigh the prospect of enhancing my growth in the reputed firm I had left behind. But this was just the beginning of the road to selfless sacrifices. Facing mammoth interviews in the new city without a faint hint of selection made me disgruntled, but finally I entered a well-established export house.

Within a few months, my husband got an opportunity to work on an assignment overseas. I had to take a stand - either I move with him or remain steadfast in my job. “Work is the least important thing and family is the most important” opines Jerry Seinfeld and it is on this that I based my decision.

Change is almost inevitable
The transformation from a professional to a homemaker was a little baffling. Instead of communicating with buyers and designers in a techno savvy ambience, I began dictating my terms and conditions with the maid, as if to establish a point. My amateur brush with cooking landed me in squabbles with my husband. A few months later, I was pregnant. My job prospects became all the more bleak.

Now, as the mother of a five – month - old baby, I enjoy watching his smiles and chuckles, and each new learning with an avid interest. His bursts of laughter lift my drooping spirit. Changing diapers and tending to his needs is a mammoth job in itself - sans perks, appreciation or a sense of self worth.

My inspirationI try to draw my learning from the women I am closest in my life - my mother and sister. My mother willingly settled into happy domesticity, took care of my sister and me. Now having wed both her daughters, she is left at home, all by herself. For her, time seems to loom large as she eagerly awaits my father’s return from office. She wants to begin a career to occupy her fertile mind but has limited opportunities for not having had any experience.

My sister, however, pursued her ambitions and resumed work after a five - month maternity leave .My niece is left at the crèche and my sister feels guilty for not devoting enough time to her daughter. It’s hard to strike a balance.

Where do we truly stand?These two extreme cases leave me in a confused state of mind. Women’s lib and other movements may have created more opportunities for today’s women, but it has failed to touch base with this issue. Having a sense of independence, which is followed by a deep sense of guilt does not make a woman advanced in a true sense.
Can’t men shoulder an equal responsibility to rear children so that women can have a brighter future? More avenues of part time job opportunities can help a woman to make two ends meet within a comfortable stretch.